BETA DAY

Sorry I haven't updated.  It has not been the smoothest 2WW.

 The morning of transfer, I woke up at about 5 am.  I wanted to go have my quiet time.  Today was a big day, and C and I decided it was likely going to be the last time we are going to do this regardless of the outcome (although we have said that many times).  But for some reason, this time it felt more real.  I sat down with my bible and devotion and opened to todays devotional and the heading was TRUST ME ANYWAY.  It was the perfect thing for me to read that morning and honestly the only way I could get through this 2ww.  I'm just going to share my instagram post I wrote that morning...

"I took this picture a few months ago on my way to a hair appointment. The sunset was just so gorgeous that I literally had to pull over the car to capture it. I thanked God for making such a beautiful sunset. Sometimes it seems like they happen at the perfect time, like they were painting just for... me! Do you ever feel that way?

In my quiet time this morning, I was reading in a devotional I actually bought for my kiddos. It brought tears to my eyes. The heading was "Trust Me Anyway" it was like he was speaking directly to me! 

And then the verse... "I told you these things so that you can have peace in me. In this world you will have trouble. But be brave! I have defeated the world!" John 16:33

God doesn't promise us a problem free life, but he does promise to be with us through the storms. One thing is for certain, when my faith was tested through this journey and our four miscarriages, He NEVER let me go, even when I wanted to. He hung on to me when my faith hung on by a thread. Now, even through SO much heartache, I can stand firm in his love for me. I may never understand the why we had to go through this trial, but Lord, I do trust you anyway."

Transfer went smoothly.  Everything happened as it should.  Usually, I am a nervous wreck, anxiety is at a all time high, but this time was different.  I was calm, relaxed even.  I usually want to go strait home on bedrest, but this time, C and I went out to lunch!  We stopped by a new little restaurant called Eat Chow.  And because everyone always eat Mc Donald's Fries afterward (I just can't do that knowing how many chemicals are in their food!), we ordered some truffle garlic fries instead! OMGosh SO delish!

Then, I went home on bedrest.

Dr. P requires strict bedrest is required for three days (I only did two days with my twins).  The next morning, however, I woke up with a UTI of all things.  I tried to get someone to call in a prescription for me, but no one would.  First I was sent to my labcorp, but they couldn't test with a dip stick, only culture. So, Finally I ended up in urgent care, got my usual macrobid, and went back home.  I was terrified to take an antibiotic thinking it would kill the embryo, but I also didn't want a kidney infection.  I had to remind myself of what I felt God was telling me, "Trust me anyway!"

It cleared up right away, but on the second day, I ended up with a rash all over my abdomen.  It was the macrobid!  I have taken it many times before but now i'm allergic! Great!  My body is attacking the embryo!  TRUST ME ANYWAY!  I stopped the Macrobid after the second day, the third day, the rash was all over my face! Oh this is terrible, I am sure this cycle is a BUST.  TRUST ME ANYWAY!

Pray. Wait. Trust.

Dr's wanted me to take a STRONGER antibiotic Cipro, but since I wasn't having any more UTI symptoms, I decided not to take it.  I picked up a natural alternative called D-Mannose.  I started taking that every three hours when I stopped the macrobid.  Apparently it worked!

My symptoms started 3dp6dt:  Major bloat, sore boobs on the sides, heaviness  and pulling in uterus. I feel like as soon as implantation happens, I get this pooch!  It has progressively gotten bigger and bigger all week!

4dp6dt, I got a squinter on a FRER.  I mean it was like a barely there, am I seeing things squinter

5dp6dt, I was still questioning it. So I went and got these walmart cheapie tests...

6dp6dt, I wrote, "Symptoms: HOT all night, pulling and heaviness in the uterus, peed twice last night.  

Its all been the same, just increasing symptoms, peeing on sticks like a crazy lady!  Starting at 4 weeks and 1 day, I noticed an increase in my appetite.  I had vegan french toast for breakfast and then i was STARVING after church and all I wanted was a hamburger!  We went to the habit and i had a lettuce wrap double double!  I hadn't eaten there since I was pregnant with my boys. The last two mornings I've eating homemade meatballs and marinara for breakfast.  

The weirdest part is, I thought I would be ballooning up from the prednisone I'm on. Nope!  I've lost seven pounds!  I'm down to 135 as of this morning, and that is with me having a giant bloated tummy!  I think my body likes prednisone.  I was terrified of getting moon face.  But I'm losing weight!

I woke up this morning and took this test, 12dp6dt, which apparently is the same as 12dp5dt.  I just did that receptivity test to confirm my Uterus is receptive day six (like when i had my boys).

Best test yet, and you know I'm going to keep on testing!  I can't wait til Friday!  They just keep getting better.  Blood is drawn!  We also did our repeat immune labs... 10 vials of blood, checking my NK cells, antibodies etc. C had to do some too for it too.  I will get a report in a couple days and then I will know what my next dose of IVIG needs to be for next Wednesday!

BETA TEST

OMG... I just got the call!!!!! I'm PREGNANT!!!!!  291 is the number!  Thank you JESUS!  I wish it was like the first time all over again.  Crying, tears of joy!  Unfortunately, that joy has been robbed from me.  I am SO happy we have a GREAT number, we have such a LONG road ahead.  My next beta is Friday... three days away!  Please Lord, protect this life.  Give us this baby we have desperately prayed for. Your will your way is always the right ways Lord, but please give us your favor once more.  We love you Lord.  You are the author and creator of life.  Your name is who we praise.  Your name and your name alone will be the one I praise for all of my days.  To you be the glory Lord, of this precious life. Amen.

See that bump!  It was flat as a board, but now I have a pooch! Praise Jesus! (bruises from heparin!)

The results are in!!! Beta 11dp5dt FET#4

I've been pacing around all morning on pins and needles. We finally left to do some shopping. I told C that. He had to stay with me in case they called, but of course he was across the entire store when my phone rang! Eeeek!! To be honest with you all, I'm really surprised by the number, meaning I thought (and was hoping!) it would be higher! However, it is a solid #. With my twins my first Beta at 10dpt was 167, with my March pregnancy my first beta 10dpt was 33, and this beta 11dpt 126!!!!! God is so good! He is totally getting all the glory for this pregnancy! I know it's too early to tell, but I'm thinking singleton! And yes, my heart sinks a tiny bit knowing one may have not made it again.

For now, I will rejoice and be glad.... I'm pregnant!!! Next Beta is Monday!!

Thank you for all your kind messages, good vibes, and prayers! ❤️

I never thought I would say this...

I'm PREGNANT!!!!!!!  176 is the magic Beta number!!!!!! I am in complete shock!!!!!!!! 

***
Updated

Okay, now that I've calmed down a tad...

I'm not in TOTAL shock... I had a small inklings, things that made me think, MAYBE?  Remember a few days ago, I thought maybe I felt the bloat coming back, well it did.  Not too bad though, where I definitely would know either way.  I also felt weird sharp pains down my cervix yesterday.  I got really tired at 6pm, even though I made myself stay up til 10 (I just had the pregnant tired feeling).  I ate a good dinner at CPK's last night. I had the roasted vegetable salad with chicken, asparagus soup, AND 2 small slices of C's very thin crust pizza.  That's a big meal and at 10 I was already hungry!  Plus I woke up at 5am starving and had to go eat!  I thought that was really weird this morning.  Another thing, my bb's have been big and sore from after ER so I knew that wasn't associated, but then they started going away, like 4-5 days ago, but the last couple days they felt way more sore AND huge!  The main give away for me though was the bloating and I had tons of AF cramping.

I know that's a lot of "symptoms" I put those in quotes because I have felt many, not all of them before with my IUI cycles.  Please take them as a grain of salt (if your in the 2WW).  But I know I loved reading others "symptoms" and obsessing over mine :)

So after I posted my last blog entry I was waiting like 30 min and my phone started to ring.  It was 1045, they said they wouldn't call until 1130 or 1200.  I yelled up at C "OMG its the doctors, do I answer it?" I'm freaking out saying this!  He says to answer it and I put it on speaker phone...

Me: "Hello? Hi!"

Nurse Tressa:  "Hi, I thought you weren't going to answer the phone!"

Me:  "I know, but I couldn't help it!"

Nurse Tressa: "Well, I'm glad you did, YOUR PREGNANT!!!"

Me:"OMG, OMG,"  I burst into tears, laughing and crying all at once. C comes running down stairs and grabs me holding me as I cry, with a HUGE smile on his face of course!

Nurse Tressa: "Your HCG is 176, your very pregnant!"

Me:  "Oh wow that's great!" I continue laughing and crying.

Nurse Tressa: "You need to come in Sunday before 9 for your second blood test and continue your meds."

C jumps in, "Thank you Thank you!  Before 9?!  We'll be there!"  He is always the joker.

After he hung up the phone we laughed together in shock and I of course continue crying while he held me.  We are so happy, words cannot express. 

First and foremost...  I thank the Lord for this miracle!  He had His hand in this from the beginning.  Lots of prayer and from His leading, we got to this point.  Praise God for giving us this Blessing!

2010 good bye... Hello 2011!  Happy New Years to you all!  Thanks for following and I so appreciate all of the support through this journey.  It took us 2 1/2 years for us to get our first BFP!!!