Thursday, December 31, 2009

Our Christmas pics...

Me and my loving, oh so supportive, husband!
Oliver (my baby), and I
Our Happy Family (sans Zoe our cat, she jumped over the wall)

On a slightly happier note, I thought I would share some Christmas pics of my family

In Mourning Again...

I am so depressed today. I really don't have much to write, except that my temperature dropped today and now I'm in waiting for AF to show her ugly face... I can't think of any thing else, so this it it, I guess.

Saturday, December 19, 2009

My day at the RD...

was so awesome! I'm seeing Diane Keddy ( MS, RD, FAED, a registered dietitian and nutritionist who focuses on these things:

Anorexia nervosa, bulimia nervosa, binge eating disorder, and emotional eating
•Members of Overeaters Anonymous (OA)
•Children and teens with picky eating
•ADD, ADHD and Asperger's
•Depression, anxiety and bipolar disorder

•Weight loss
•Diabetes, pre-diabetes and Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS)

•Menopause and mid-life weight gain
•Irritable bowel syndrome (IBS)
•Wellness and optimum health

•High cholesterol, high triglycerides and high blood pressure
•Heart disease prevention
•Cancer prevention

•Autoimmune illness
•Fibromyalgia, chronic fatigue syndrome and arthritis
•Interstitial cystitis
•Other medical concerns

She was so was thorough! Our appt was 1 1/2 hours. She asked me so many questions to get a good basis of where I am physically as well as emotionally. I brought my blood work in. She went over it, I'm healthy as a horse, except I have elevated testosterone and my glucose levels were in the high but normal range, therefore I'm not IR (Insulin resistant).

I have always struggled with poor body image. I started this at a very young age actually. My first memory is when I was about in third or fourth grade. I was kneeling and I remember telling my mom that I wish I could cut off part of my thigh. Was I over weight or fat? Far from it. But I was a minority where I went to school. My friends were of Asian, Hispanic, or Black decent, had small frames and were quite thin. I was tall, German, and had a larger body frame. Now, my husband says I look like a "Coke bottle." I guess that's a complement.

Come puberty, I began getting more "curvy," got acne, and had very irregular periods. After school in High School, my friends (who were size zero's) and I would go to Carl's Jr and get a famous star, criss-cut fries, and a Mr. Pib. They would stay skinny, I would get fat. I didn't get it. We were all active, hiking in the hills, skate boarding to get around. But I was the one always gaining weight.

When I was 17, I started paying attention to nutrition labels. I remember the shock about what was in soda... 44 grams of sugar and 150 calories. I quit drinking soda then. I really cleaned up my diet, but focused on calories, rather than quality of food.

In college I always took an exercise class, jogging, weight training, yoga, etc. I was still very diet conscience. I got skinnier... about 140 lbs on my 5'6" large framed body. I looked good.

The last two years of college, I worked at a gym. I ate super healthy, worked out like 5-6 days a week. I never met my goals. I still had cellulite on my rear and my "six pack" never developed. I was a personal trainer. I knew what to do, why couldn't I get there?

After years of always trying to get to my "ideal," years of being on a diet, years of trying the next best thing, I realized that maybe that would never happen. Maybe there were more important things to focus on.

Now I'm here. I still struggle with wanting the "perfect body," but now, wanting a baby more. Diane let me know that many PCOSr's struggle with this same thing. Because our bodies produce too much insulin, the excess get stored as fat, hence the difficulties in losing weight. She is going to be working with me on getting my body healthy as well as my mind. I need to have a better relationship with food and a better body image since I'm going to be a mom one day. Kids pick up eating disorder issues and poor body image issues as young as two years old. I need to show them how to eat dessert in a healthy way. I usually don't keep it in the house. Kids who grow up in Orange County are even at a greater risk (Anyone watch The real OC House Wives?).

Diane is going to be working with me every three weeks on these issues. She also says I will probably lose some weight because I will be controlling my insulin levels by eating a low glycemic diet. I was shocked to learn that sour dough bread (my favorite!), was a lower GI than whole wheat bread, and that cake was a low GI because of the fat! I really like this "diet!"

Here is what she is having me do to start:

1) Continue Prenatal Vitamin,
Metformin, Vitamin D, Calcium (Discontinue B-complex, baby asprin)

2) 3 odorless Fish oil cap's (1800 mg EPA/DHA)/day

3) Sleep 8 hours/night (I struggle with that during work week)

4) Skip the gym. Walk the dog 20 min. one day, 40 min the next. Yoga and light weights okay 2 days/week at home. (Any stress on the body tells it not to get PG).

5) Breathing exercises to reduce stress

6) A Low GI diet (she gave me a book with all the foods listed. Shocking!)

The IF Journey continues...

Wednesday, December 9, 2009

Not sure what to do.

I have been doing so much research on PCOS its crazy. I feel so educated on it! I know that diet plays such a huge role. I eat super healthy as it is... I eat a clean diet (whole grains, lean meats, fruits, veggies, nothing processed, etc.). But, I wanted more info on eating to balance hormones. I found a dietitian in Newport Beach who specializes in PCOS. When I spoke with her she was so friendly, VERY informative and extremely helpful. I have an appointment with her on Monday.

I told her that I knew diet was influential in PCOS and that it can help with symptoms. She replied that "yes, diet played a huge role but that metformin was also key." She was shocked that I was not on it AND that no one had every talked to me about it... So am I! I'm surprised that Dr. D never put me on it, especially since research shows it makes PCOSr's more fertile! One of my friends, is currently doing follistim and she had been on met for about 3 months prior to starting. She is not insulin resistant (neither am I), but her RE put her on it immediately. She got pregnant on the second try... although it was a chemical pregnancy, she still got pregnant! With PCOS, our androgens (male hormones) are high, which studies show it can lower egg quality! I'm pissed that my RE never gave me Met, prior to doing follistim!

Anyways, I am considering taking it. I called Dr. D and he said it wouldn't hurt (obviously!).

BTW, I think PCOS causes your body to give you signs of ovulation and then you don't fully get there. I was COMPLETELY WRONG the other day. I feel like an idiot and almost didn't write about this, but I don't want to be posting false info. I HAVE NOT ovulated yet. But, I do think I'm close.

I also read a while ago that your body can give you mixed signals... hence the clear blue easy fertility monitor isn't always accurate for those of us with PCOS! I am still using those hard to read OPK's, haven't got a positive yet. I just thought that maybe it was wrong because I drink so much water, it couldn't pick it up! Oh well. Will post when I see my temp jump. I am currently CD21. Lets pray its earlier that last month, which was CD30! So frustrating!

Monday, December 7, 2009


I am in shock and utter disbelief! I am now a FIRM believer in acupuncture... and Gods miracles! I just ovulated on CD 19... the earliest in my life! I probably sound like a broken record from last month, but its EARLIER than last month... 11 days EARLIER! Its almost a NORMAL cycle! So amazing.

Since I have now been paying attention to ALL the signs your body gives you prior to ovulation, I knew I was going to O this week. I was a crazy woman all this week... wanting to jump my husband and BD every second (I am not exaggerating!)! Since last thursday I have been like a cat in heat (Is this what its like to have normal hormones floating threw your body?)! Then since I started checking my Cervical Mucus (CM) last month, I knew what to look for this month. I had very water CM since Thursday (thank you Evening primerose oil!), and then last night it was egg white (sorry TMI). I actually think I am still fertile because I haven't seen my temp jump yet... I'm anticipating that for tomorrow. We have been BDing like crazy, so if I'm not pregnant this month I will be shocked!

Anyways, other than that good news everything has been peachy. We got the house all decorated right after thanksgiving, along with our fabulous Christmas tree. I love love LOVE christmas, so I am looking forward to what it brings... Baby? We'll see, I've been praying for a baby every day!!!
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