Showing posts with label 8dp5dt. Show all posts
Showing posts with label 8dp5dt. Show all posts

Friday, July 31, 2015

9dp5dt... FET#3

As of yesterday, all symptoms, are gone.  No cramps, no sore bbs (well at least no more sore than they were), nothing is noticeable anymore.  I have to admit, I'm feeling completely let down.  I have a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach saying, "this didn't work."

Before yesterday, I had the "I'm 90% sure this DID work," feeling. Why!? Why!? Why is this so dang hard.  Why does this hurt so bad?  It is so true that no matter where you are in your journey, if you have one kid, two kids, or however many, any amount of IF really hurts.  My heart feels broken once again.

I really needed to cry this morning. I did.  I felt better.  For some reason my mind keeps going back to this image...

"The Child Who Was Never Born" by Martin Hudeceka


My heart is heavy. For all of us.

I have not POAS, so I know I don't have a definitive answer, but I am not optimistic.  I'm sorry for being so down and depressed.

The one time I want to be bloated (my one real definitive symptom), my stomach is as flat as a board.

Monday, July 6, 2015

Maybe Third Times the Charm?


6dp5dt I tested because last time I got my first BFP that early... BFN!  

7dp5dt I tested because IF it would surely be positive by now if it was going to work... BFN!

8dp5dt I tested because I had spotting and I REALLY wanted to take my patches off and stop all meds (but didn't)... BFN!  I also started getting sore BB's this day, super late, not a good sign.

9dp5dt I woke up to my period. BAM! BIG FAT NEGATIVE! This was on Fourth of July.

Back to the drawing board again  


What an emotional roller coaster!  I was on and off the phone with the nurses at my RE for the last few days, then texting my RE, Dr. R., on Fourth of July!  He is the BEST, helping me on the holiday no less.

I was really back and forth prior to starting this last cycle, on weather or not to do PIO (progesterone in oil) or the suppositories again.  My gut was telling me PIO, but my bum was telling me suppositories.  I also talked one of the RE's about it (Dr. C) and she said they were the same basically, but you can't check the P4 level  with the suppositories in the blood.

After speaking with Dr. R, I AM doing the PIO this cycle.  There is no way I should be having all this bleeding problem, so my body isn't absorbing the P4 well.  So maybe my 4AA (the one I miscarried) was viable and I just needed more p4? We'll never know, but it makes me sad.  My poor 3 AB didn't make it either! :(

I'm cd3 today and bleeding very heavily... 1 super + every 2 hours! Yesterday was worse.  I had my lining check today and my lining is still pretty thick, 9mm, which means I still have many days of bleeding to do :(  Starting some iron supplements so I don't get anemic again!

The good news is that we are jumping right in to another FET! Yay!  I'm so happy they don't make you wait a cycle if you get a BFN!

My updated protocol and  schedule...


CD3- lining check and blood test, start E2 patches

CD8- blood test again

CD10- having an office hysteroscopy and u/s to make sure there isn't anything in there (polyps, m/c leftovers, fibroid, etc.

CD14- u/s to check lining again and get transfer date!

CD21 - Tentative transfer day and we are transferring a six day 4 AB (July 23)

The last few days of my 2ww I didn't update because I ended up getting really sick with a sinus infection, having to get on antibiotics, and I was EXHAUSTED, physically from the sickness and emotionally from the 2WW.  Luckily it was right before the Fourth so we ending up have an amazing day.  We rode our bikes to watch the annual Huntington Beach parade and then we had a big swim party with fireworks.  It was a good day after a crappy 2WW... and yes, I enjoyed my wine! ;)


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